Buses: Seat ninjas and KFC

Why do people act like idiots on buses? There is always one person on the bus who doesn't know what a shower is for. Infact people use the bus as a place to be plain rude. There is a girl sitting behind me eating KFC and it STINKS!! Does she not realise this is a confined space? There is an old git reading a book opposite me who just gave me a thermonuclear stare for daring to cough whilst he reads his book.

People scream down the phone, and blast their crappy electrohouse music, thinking they're 'cool'. School girls with their annoying high pitched whining voices bitch about each other, squeal and discuss 'loosing their virginities' (not what I want to be hearing at 7 in the morning). and let's not forget the string of cocky lads who like to use the fact we're all confined into such a small space to touch up women and come out with charming chat up lines such as 'You've got a good neck, I love a bitch with a good neck' (guy on the bus to me last Thursday).

The trauma starts before you even get on the bus, you stand in the pissing rain for what seems like hours for the bus that is late YET again

When a seat is free, everybody on the bus suddenly transforms into a pack of wild animals as they all descend on the free seat, beating each other up to see who's the alpha fe/male who gets the seat.

Then you get seat ninjas like me, who make strategic plans based on Who, Why, and Where to get a seat, and when the plan pays off, normally within five seconds, sit there smugly grinning to themselves as they immerse themselves in their book, while the disgruntled commuters who haven't learnt the ancient art of being a 'seat ninja' look on enviously. Let's be honest, living in London you need to learn to be a seat ninja if you ever want to sit down.

In short buses are the bane of our lives. We all hate them, but have no choice but to use them.

Here are a few more reasons to hate buses:
• They're boiling hot
• There is always one person who stares at you as though they're going to rip your throat out.
• They're expensive and slow
• Buses appear to be like limos for chavs who aren't the slightest bit bothered that their 30 kids they've brought onto the bus are running riot.
• couples smooching and practically dry humping in the back row
• cuntish bus drivers (their mothers should have swallowed)...

Peaches x